When He Denies Being The Father Because You Weren’t In A Relationship

 

There are some men who simply go through a denial phase, then there are others who genuinely do question their paternity, especially if they were in a no strings attached situation.
Obviously, the first thing a pregnant woman in these circumstances will do is prove to the man that he is indeed the father by inviting him to take a DNA test to prevent unnecessary drama, but this can only happen once the baby is born which means that depending on the type of man he is, she may have to go through the pregnancy alone without his support.

If the father of your child is denying his paternity because you were in a no strings attached situation AND you were seeing other men, then of course his doubts are understandable and no one could blame him for having those doubts, but that doesn’t mean he has the right to treat you badly-because he still made the choice not to wear a condom so is just as irresponsible.
Unfortunately, the truth is that men who have sex with women- but are not committed to them are only supposed to be innocent fun- if no baby making was ever thought of the whole time on his part it means he isn’t ready for a child right now.
He may eventually man up, but for now to women in these circumstances I would advise that you give the father some time to cool off and come to terms with the situation, do not chase him, or keep going around in circles of “you are the father” “no I’m not” you definitely won’t get the truth from there, it’s not good for both of you and ultimately could be what prevents you from getting him to take a DNA test. Your actions now are what’s important, a lot of how you behave will determine his thoughts and what he chooses to do, if you make his life hell before the baby is even born then he may decide that he doesn’t need the responsibility or life long connection to you. Simply let him know that you are sorry about how he feels, but you are certain he is the father and would like to prove it with a DNA test once the baby is born. Let him know that you appreciate any support he is able to give you during your pregnancy, but if he chooses not to be there for you because of his doubts then you hope he will choose be there for the DNA test and then for his baby once his paternity has been proven.

You cannot blame a man who is genuinely unsure of his paternity for choosing not to be involved until he has proof of being the father, it would be unfair for him to dismiss his gut feelings to support a woman through a pregnancy and then form a bond with a child who is not his.

The thing is, these days a no strings attached situation is extremely similar to a relationship, they can last for years and years. Women find themselves being wives to men they aren’t even in relationships with and some of these men actually move in with these women, help out financially, meet their family, go on holidays together, etc. making it either even more confusing to the woman about where she stands or giving her the illusion that things have naturally progressed from what used to be a situationship to a relationship. These types of men know deep down that they are the fathers but deny it with the excuse of not being in a relationship, out of fear of having to now be committed to the woman in new ways via a child, and no longer being able to not owe her any explanations, or come and go as he once pleased, because to an extent he will now be depended on and all the fun and fuss made over him will be over.
All any pregnant woman experiencing this can do for herself in this case, is wait until the baby is born to be able to have the DNA test done, in the meantime don’t put your life on hold! Allow the wait of the arrival of your baby to motivate you to do things you enjoy, and remember, no matter what he says about it not being his baby, everyone still knows it’s your baby, and you are all your baby really needs!

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